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A Bone to pick my teeth with October 17, 2006

Posted by Woody in Uncategorized.

Greetings fond readers of the blog! I give you today a proverbial bone to pick. The unmotivated, lack of dedication and drive some members of the gym display.

It is such an interesting experience to have sat on both sides of this fence. Not so long ago I sat around smoking a pack of cigarettes a day, lacked ambition and motivation to have any sorts of exercise nor empathy for my own health. I remember smoking in public around people who appeared active and listened to their complaints. Oh how I would get frustrated with them when they voiced the concerns over the stench of the smoke. Now what is so interesting about this is that since I have quit smoking my nose is for some reason hyper-sensitive to the smell of smoke. Just the other day I walked near a smoker without realizing it and it was like someone punched me square in the face. I couldn’t believe how the smell of cigarette smoke impacted me. I was that guy that I wanted to slap so many times for making a scene about smoking. NOTE TO SMOKERS: Hey guys and gals its not the non-smokers that are driving you nuts over the smell. It’s the EX-smokers. Be angry with me its kewl, I understand and still love you. I just can’t deal with phillip-morris trying to further our addictions, and I can’t continue to not have any concern for the stupid decisions we make. This is important to keep in mind since I only quit smoking a few months ago.

Ok so there’s my ‘before I go off about gym members lacking motivation let me explain I’ve seen both sides’ speech.

Onward to the bone to pick! I am getting a real kick out of the five minute workout. All I do currently is the treadmill so I am sticking to that section of the gym as this is where I am seeing so much of this half-heartedness. People, those commercials your seeing for 5 minute buns, 5 minute abs, 5 minute pecks. If you want to do it in 5 minutes it will take you 5 years. Get off the ‘I’ll just rest for a few minutes’ and the ‘its ok to quit early today, I’ll make up for it tomorrow’ ideas and get with your commitment! I laugh at the thought that so many people go into this half-hearted. Do you have that approach to your work? To your family? It never fails. I’ll get on the a treadmill, get my watch/heart rate monitor set, start the mill and my clock. I get oh about ¼ or ½ mile in and here her/she comes. The ‘I’m gonna show this old man something’. LOL bring it beoch. Up the pace goes they get running so damn fast they are near a full sprint. I can see it in their eyes they feel victorious. Running so much faster then me. Coming up on a mile. They are walking… then they start running again. This time not quite as fast. Me, I’m still keeping pace. Around 160 beats per min or somewhere between 10-11 minutes a mile. Now they occasionally will just straddle the treadmill, so it continues to run but they can stand stationary on the sides of it. They rest like that for a few minutes then start running again. Again, I am still keeping that pace and approaching my third mile. Now they are tired, frustrated that this old fat guy isn’t getting smoked like they thought he was. Time to switch out! Here come his/her boyfriend/girlfriend/friend to see what they can do. Same… Same… Same pattern. Keep in mind that I only do the short runs at the gym. So 4-8 miles later not having stopped to pick my ass, flex my butt cheeks, or flirt with someone half my age, I have completed my run in a reasonable time. So I give this to you, oh sultan of the half-assed run, next time you consider trying to look better then that old fat guy on the treadmill next to you, consider what your up against, chances are he’s not there to look at your girlfriend. He’s on a mission, and you’ll run your ass into the ground trying to pace him with your half-hearted efforts.



1. Pez - October 17, 2006

so you admit that you’re fat ;o)

2. jwoodruff - October 17, 2006

Yes, I do admit, I am a beast. ;o)

3. Tony - October 18, 2006

Here is what I dont get. The damn Bowflex commercial told me I would have a Bowflex body in 30 days. It has now been 30 days….and nothing. No change. Is there something I am missing? I dont have to actually get on the frickin thing….do I???

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